Hi Felicia, we’re back for another episode right now and yet another recap that you’ve been kind enough to keep coming back to read. I’ll start this one off with calling Julie out on her terrible pun game. She gets it somewhat right with the “out to pasture” pun about the Country Asian, but come on, Julie, Jeff’s is hand-wrapped to you in your CBS blood. It should have been said as “Is Jeff’s RACE for $500,000…” not hunt. If anything, the hunt pun could have been used for the country boy next to him, but Jeff was on this little show called Amazing Race. You know it? You know, the show that Phil, the first BB Takeover guy, hosts?!? You know better than that, Julie. I don’t watch your talk show, but after seeing you fumble so often as the host of this show, I know I’m doing myself a favor by not watching. Sure is a great thing you’re married to the President of CBS. Don’t ever leave him.
Oh, James. I think we need picture proof of these hot chicks you have waiting for you at home! But truly, you know what the saddest part of that whole conversation was, it was the fact that whoever said he has more now was right. Girls these days are probably more likely to throw themselves at someone who’s had a few seconds of fame on some stupid reality television show, no matter how stupid the person came off on said show. So maybe I take it back about needing picture proof. My guess is the Mama June lookalike’s are out the door now…
Oh, Jackie. You think that Jeff being on the block is a disaster for your game? Sorry, sweet t*ts, it’s YOU that’s the disaster to your “game.” Do you even remember what show you’re on? Do you even know you’re on a show right now? Now that Jeff is gone, I’m pretty sure we’re not ever even going to see you on camera again unless you’re nominated or playing in one of the competitions. You’re pretty worthless in that house right now. I mean, you walked out the front door on “accident” at one point. I’m pretty certain that every single Amazing Race couple they asked before you and Jeff said no because why you got cast for this show is beyond me. Oh wait, you look pretty good in a bikini, I take that back, now it makes SOME sense. Those live feed cameramen probably get shown 20 pictures of girls in bikini’s and get to choose 1 or 2 that make the show. Their perv @sses.
Oh, Meg. Direct quote from you here. “James is good at stuff.” Meg?!? What stuff? What f*cking stuff is James good at? Were you not watching the last Battle of the Block? The man couldn’t even walk up to a person, stare at the pattern on their body, then walk back to a table and find that exact pattern. YOU were playing against him in that competition and you guys finished off the last 8 patterns as he found 1. But yes, he’s “good at stuff,” so you should vote him out. Jeff is an idiot, too, so at the end of it all your decision isn’t the worst idea ever, but the reasoning behind it is faulty. Just play the game topless from here on out, because I’m starting to see no other reason as to why you got cast for this show, either. Another one of those cameramen choices, apparently.
I’d hit you with an Oh, Jeff here but I’m sure you’re tired of that shenanigan. But seriously, crying? That may have been the LAMEST thing I’ve ever seen in Big Brother history. There have been some pretty lame things going on with this show, but Jeff crying while talking to Shelli may take the cake. Why even bother? Part of me thinks he may have done it sincerely and afterward just backtracked, but even so, LAME. I get it, men can cry, but you’re playing Big Brother, you don’t need to justify your actions in the game by getting THAT emotional just because you believe the person you’re talking to is emotional and may react well to you showing “real” emotions. In the end, it didn’t even pay off, so now you just have to live with the fact that you cried on Big Brother over something that truly wasn’t even that bad. You had to apologize because at one point or another you MAY have said something about getting Clay or Shelli out “at some point.” Gee, really? And why would Shelli and Clay even feel bad about it since, I don’t know, they’re in on the plan to get Jeff out this week!!!! Ugh…these players this season are outrageously frustrating. I think we should start a petition to send to CBS to NOT give anyone the money. Just cancel the season now because if nobody is getting better by this point, they’re not going to ever. Someone like Steve is going to win this season because he’ll have an “Ian moment” where he names the alliance a cool name and because of that everyone thinks he’s some awesome genius, strategic mastermind.
And let’s also expedite another petition to have Big Brother end this stupid Twin Twist. Everyone in the house knows, the twins openly talk about everyone knowing, and you even edit the episodes to show them talking about how everyone knows. I’m confused by this whole charade. Just put an end to it and either let them both come in the house or have some sort of competition between Liz and Julia to see which one gets to play the rest of the way since they were found out because one has a Jennifer Lopez @ss and the other’s is more Mario Lopez.
After we get the twins switching spots, we get to see how creepily Austin is falling for Liz. All of this is even more creepy when you find out that Austin has a girlfriend back home. Or I guess I should say DID have a girlfriend back home, because I can’t imagine she’s too pleased with seeing and hearing all of this. I mean, the man said “I’d sacrifice himself in this game to fulfill the emptiness in my heart.” He’s sleeping in the bed with her, making her dinners and such. I can’t imagine any woman is too pleased with seeing that kind of stuff going on. With Christine last season with Cody, that was definitely awkward, but she wasn’t saying crazy stuff like “fulfilling emptiness in my heart” and whatnot. And for him to get all upset about her being under the covers with Jeff just shows jealousy towards someone he’s not even “with.” And to be jealous towards someone means some real emotions are attached to them and that makes it all the more real. I think Austin’s going to have some explaining to do when he gets home. Although I’d imagine he’s going to come home to less personal items than he left behind. Maybe a few broken trophies, some burned clothes, a dead cat perhaps. I don’t know…story pending.
At the live vote, we surely see why Liz was under the covers with Jeff as she shows she has a mind of her own and votes for him to stay in the house. That whole “boys and girls can’t be friends” statement Liz made seems to be linked more towards Jeff than Austin now that she’s voting for Jeff to stay in the house. We all know the vote didn’t matter, but still it does say a lot for where her mind/heart was at. She got to see how butt hurt Austin gets at things she’s more than free to do and she wanted to put an end to that flirtmance. However, she’s kind of stuck now because if she backtracks from Austin, she may find herself on a losing team since Austin and company seem to have decent control in the house.
But, as I said, her vote didn’t matter and Jeff still got voted out, 7-4. I actually thought it wouldn’t be that close, but was happy to see a somewhat split vote as we’re all tired of seeing the house voting together. So, as I said before, Bye Felicia!
And let’s be honest here, Jeff, you don’t EXPECT Jackie to win this game. How about we learn what words mean before we go ahead and use them on national television for millions of people to see and hear. There’s NO WAY in hell that Jackie is winning this show or any other show or competition. She wouldn’t even win a 5th grade science class competition at her age right now, and that’s including if her exhibit was her naked body. She’d still somehow flub that one up and lose to the kid who built a volcano out of play-doh and a bunsen burner. Hell, even Julie practically slapped him and called him a moron with what he was saying about Jackie. In her head she was probably thinking “are we talking about the same girl?” She even called Jackie a floater, which earned her a few respect points from me. Kudos, JChen.
Real quick, we also need to investigate the whole Liz and Julia goodbye message to Jeff. “Sorry for voting you out.” Wait, what?!? Did I hear them wrong? Just a few minutes ago, Jiz voted James out and to keep Jeff, so why in the diary message did they tell Jeff they were sorry for voting him out? I would have got it if they said “we’re sorry to see you go” or something along those lines, but now I’m just confused. Is this the one instance in Big Brother history where someone changed their vote at the last minute? If so, we need to know more behind this. I think I’ll just chalk it up to Jiz being the dumb blonde she swore she wasn’t and just said the wrong J name to the head J, Julie. Weird moment.
We end the night with the HoH competition. And it was a doozy. We got some Kid ‘N’ Play action packed dancers that CBS obviously wasted money on paying to learn the routine and come on the show. Let’s hope they all are interns at CBS and they didn’t have to pay them to do that, because if so, this show really is going to sh*t. Anyway, in the end, it was Shelli and Jiz pulling out the HoH victories. At first, when Julie said “Congratulations” and I still saw two people left, I thought to myself she was messing up, but then I remembered the stupid two HoH thing is still happening. But, whatever. With Jiz going against what Austin wanted, and Austin being in an alliance with Shelli (and Jiz, and Jiz being aligned with Shelli, too), what exactly will happen this week?!? Will Jiz make a stand against the alliance and choose who she wants out? I doubt it. I’d imagine four non-sixth sense members will be going up. So, Steve, James, Jason, and Meg should just get their nomination chair @ss cushions ready to go because they’ll probably be back up on the block again. Or, instead of Steve, we may see Johnny back on it for yet ANOTHER thrown Battle of the Block. I doubt they’ll be that dumb, though. My guess is they target James for eviction this week, but will settle for Jason going if he doesn’t. Just my guesses.
And so that wraps up another week (weak) of Big Brother. Let’s show back up on Sunday (well, Monday for this recap but Sunday for the show) to watch who gets nominated and who stays up as nominated after the Battle of the Block. And we’ll probably also find out what lame celebrity will be dishing out another lame BB Takeover.
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I read Vanessa’s HOH blog and it was more interesting than those I saw for past seasons. She mapped out her view of the alliances, sub alliances, and intersecting alliances. She did not believe Austin’s lie about not throwing the veto. Split vote was better than boring unanimous votes of the past. I liked Meg and Liz not going with their alliances for their own games (even if you dispute their “logic”). Liz is one of those girls who always looks like she just smelled something bad.