BIG BROTHER – 8/19/11

Written by:
Scott Ottersen
Email: ScottOttersen@yahoo.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/ScottOttersen

Another episode in the books, folks. With each one we grow closer to the finale, which I’m looking forward to more and more just to see who will be crowned Champion of the Worst Season Ever. In all honesty, I don’t think this is the worst season ever, but I do think it is one of the worst. Ever since that chick firefighter won a few years back (seriously, I don’t even care enough to do the 10 second search on google to find her name), I never thought a season could be worse, but we found ourselves a winner in that loser category. But, what can we do? I still love the show and look forward to every Sunday, Wednesday, and Thursday night to see the houseguests and all their hijinx.

This episode started off with Daniele telling us she wants Shelly out or to backdoor Brendon if the opportunity arises. When she talks to Shelly in the HOH room directly after the Veto meeting, she tells Shelly that she wants Brendon out and that she needs her or Adam to win the Veto so that can happen. Sorry Brendon, but it’s time for you to head the f*ck back out the front door. Go study more for your PhD.

I think I’m going to need Big Brother to start playing some more pranks on these houseguests. Inside one of the lounge rooms (the one with the big day bed), there is an old fortune teller machine right next to the door. We saw it as Brendon and Rachel were leaving the room after they were done rubbing their vaginas together and I just would have loved for it to scare the sh*t out of them by screaming at them as they were opening the door to leave. Things need to be livened up a little, if not even just to give the houseguests something to talk about. The more they have to talk about, the more we have to listen to and be entertained by. Who wouldn’t want to see things like that happen to Rachel? Maybe they can exchange her pimple cream for sour cream. That might actually help. I’d eat sour cream off of anything, even Rachel’s face.

Back inside the episode, Daniele now talks to Adam and tells him that she wants Brendon out and he is just a pawn in her game. Daniele is telling both him and Shelly the truth, because she does want Brendon out, but she’s also neglecting to say that she wouldn’t mind either of them going (which is obvious since she nominated them). She’s covering her bases much better this time around and setting herself up for a successful term as HOH. Dare I say, she’s playing much smarter now than before. But, that can all change at the drop of a hat in Big Brother, depending on what the producers want to have happen next.

Next came the drama portion of the episode. Shelly confronts Rachel about her ravaging lies in the game. She wants Porsche to take part in this conversation to either confirm or negate what was said. Porsche confirms that Rachel told her that Shelly ASKED about a final three deal (which is true) and Shelly goes off the deep end. I really do believe Shelly just forgot about that conversation she had with Brendon and Rachel and truly believes she’s in the right to cry about this never happening and being so upset about Rachel “lying” to everyone. But, what really set Shelly off was when Rachel brought up how Shelly said something about voting Jordan out. Shelly did NOT appreciate that (I don’t know if that truly happened or not, but I can imagine it coming up as a hypothetical) and is now plotting on how she can hunt Rachel down with a bow and arrow once outside the house. Rachel, if Shelly invites you to a wooded area in Louisiana, don’t go, you’re dead.

Anyways, I’d like to take this time to welcome Shelly to the game of Big Brother. Has she not seen the show before? Come on Shelly, you’re going to get all upset because someone is lying when they were trying to save themselves from being evicted?!? What do you think people do in this game? I don’t understand why she’s getting so worked up about something that this entire show has staked its premise on for years now. Stop being so lame and getting upset about it and just find ways to work around it. I think people are thinking too much into morals. You aren’t making yourself out to be an immoral person if you tell a little lie while you are playing Big Brother. It’s ok, the world will get over the fact that Rachel “lied” to Porsche about Shelly wanting to be in a final 3 deal with Brendon and herself. Jesus.

The Veto selection came next, and it couldn’t have worked out more perfectly for Daniele. And for Shelly and Adam, as well. Brendon and Rachel did not get picked to play in the competition, therefore the chances of being able to backdoor Brendon became more likely. Before the competition started, Daniele was talking about how this was “the perfect week.” I couldn’t agree with her more. Everything seems to be coming up roses for her. She is going to get out someone she wants gone, with the distinct possibility of Brendon being backdoor material. Shelly is deconstructing right in front of everyone and is making more and more enemies in the house. And, everyone in the game is realizing she is the power chip in the house and is trying to work with her and make deals to keep themselves in the game.

I like these Veto competitions where contestants can trade each other for the prizes they’ve won. Before the competition starts, we learn from Jordan that Jeff likes boy bands and would call her and sing boy band songs to her. Now, I’m not one to judge since I can’t lie and say I haven’t enjoyed the crooning of some boy bands, but to have it put on blast on national television like that is a little embarrassing. And, the revelation that you make phone calls to your girlfriend and sing those songs to her is a tad awkward. I think I’d need to know more behind how the singing starts and hope that alcohol is involved somehow and you’re not just doing it because you want to. But, that brings us to the million dollar question: Backstreet Boys or N*Sync?!? Personally, I think Jeff was a 98 Degrees kind of guy, myself. He kind of reminds me of Nick Lachey (yes, it’s a damn shame I know he was the singer of that group, but you can bite my ass if you think I’m lame) so I’d like to think he’s on the phone with Jordan, belting out “I Do (Cherish You)” (again, I’m lame that I didn’t even need google to remember that song). Perhaps Jeff is an O-Town guy. Or, maybe, my personal favorite, 2gether.

Anyways, this competition is a version of cornhole, a game I like to call “Bags.” We don’t live in Indiana or Kentucky, we don’t need to call it cornhole (no offense to those folks living in IN or KY-jelly). I’m not sure if they could see the numbers on the wheel as it was spinning, but it looked like they could, which means that these people would have been smart to just wait for the high numbers to go past and then throw the bag so that if they didn’t make a cornhole, the bag would fall in a lower number. But, that is just too much common sense, I guess. Anyways, Adam ends up winning after Jeff confirms with Daniele that he is not the target and throws the competition to him. The other contestants won prizes, as well, notably Jeff earning himself another $5,000 (up to $15,000 now, which I’d be happy as hell to win if I ended up getting voted out), Kalia winning a Caribbean vacation, and Daniele a Veto Ticket to play in next week’s veto competition.