Ok, let me go off path here and bring up two gripes I have. First, someone has to explain to me the saying “I can’t trust him/her as far as I can throw him/her.” How does this ever make any sense? First, trust isn’t something you can really measure. It’s not like I ever say, “Oh yeah, I trust her 10 feet. Maybe 14 feet on some days, depending on what we’re doing.” I consider myself a somewhat strong person. Sure, I was a lot stronger when I was in college and worked out every day, but I still could pick up my wife if I needed to. But, even with all the strength I have, I’m probably only getting my wife, maybe, 3 feet, on my best day. My wife is super skinny and I trust her a lot more than 3 feet. We’re talking possibly 8 feet worth of trust here. So, I’m just not sure I can understand this saying. What I’m trying to get at with this last point is that I don’t believe any grown man could pick up my wife and throw her THAT far. Sure, professional bodybuilders can probably get 5 or 6 feet out of her, so I’m just not sure where this goes. If I can’t throw any person farther than 3 feet away from myself, is that as far as I can ever trust anybody? So, as soon as someone walks 4 feet away from me, I can never trust them? I don’t get it. And, I’m a genius. I am going to start a campaign to change this saying to “I can’t trust him/her for as long as it takes me to wipe my own ass after taking a major dump in a crowded airport bathroom while 8 guys are waiting in line to also take a mean dump because we all ate the burrito from the burrito stand with no name and one Mexican guy manning the hot plate.” See, now THAT I’d understand. You wipe your ass pretty fast when you know a bunch of guys are waiting to take a dump. That’s just common courtesy. Therefore, someone says that to me, I KNOW not to trust that person.
Second, I think I’ve brought this up before, but why the hell does every reality show have a Pharmaceutical Sales Rep as a contestant?!? I feel as if these people just don’t have jobs and this is the go to occupation producers use to not embarrass these people on national television. I know what the job is and all that, so I’m not asking what that is, I’m just trying to understand why no matter what reality show you are watching, this profession is always represented. Are the producers of these shows doctors and they just happen to recommend their pharmaceutical sales rep for the position of reality star? Are people who are prone to being psr’s (seriously, I’m tired of writing it out) the type of people who are also prone to being a-holes on reality tv shows? Instead of scientists across the world studying stupid things with their stupid studies grants, they need to start studying this so I can be satisfied. Apparently I’m not alone in this quest, either, because I google’d this question and found out someone asked it before on some website called questionland.com. Some of the answers provided state that typically psr’s are pleasing to look at, that their schedules are lax (no job has a lax schedule, really), they’re always being laid off and have nothing better to do, and also that saying ‘drug dealer’ is rude. Still, none of these really answer the question. I think there is a greater link to this story.
Reading up on that work reminded me of a job I used to have. I promise, last story and I’ll get back to the show. I just graduated college, couldn’t really find any work, and basically took whatever interview I could get. I show up for the interview and should have known at that point in time to just walk away. First, the “company” (you’ll find out why this in quotes in a second) was located in some non-descript building off of some secondary road. When I got off the elevator, there were no signs with the company’s name, no nameplates for the secretary or anything of that regard. She shoveled me into some blank conference room with two chairs and a desk. Some guy with slicked-back hair, shirt and tie with suspenders, walks in and breaks right into his routine. Short story short, I got the job. I had to show up the next day at 8 (I think, maybe 7:30). I get there and everyone is just standing around in some big conference room with a big table and no chairs. We waited around for a little while, let people congregate, some guy introduced himself to me, gave me the run-around, told me some things, and then the “leader” walked in. He started going through his mantra, preaching to us about J.U.I.C.E. Again, for as much of a genius as I am, I still am pretty stupid to not see the signs any earlier than I do. After day 3, I knew this was a f*cking cult. I swear the three girls that worked there were everyone’s wives and they all raised children together on the sixth floor of the building, because we “worked” from 8 in the morning to 9 at night. And, then they all went “out” afterwards. There were no paychecks, we did all our business in cash, we did door-to-door sales selling White Sox ticket packages one day, then Pizza Parlor coupon booklets the next, selling them to anyone and everyone who would not slam their door in my face. I was attacked by a dog that could barely reach my ankles, I had to sweat my balls off wearing a suit in 95 degree Summer weather, and I think I made a total of $40 for the three days I worked there because they told me that the first week was more an initiation process and that the real money would start pouring in after that. I think the piece that finally put it all together for me was when I saw my “training manager’s” BMW. He touted himself as one of the top earners when he first introduced himself to me, told me he lived in Naperville (an effluent suburb out here), drove a BMW, and banged chicks every night after throwing money around at nearby clubs. Then, on the end of my last day there, I saw his BMW. I think the thing was 8 years old and had a body like Jodi’s, all beat up and doughy looking. And, that is more offensive to the BMW than Jodi, trust me. Anyway, my whole point is that I was almost ass-raped by a cult. I’m almost willing to bet that after day 5, I would have had the choice to either drink the J.U.I.C.E. (which I WISH I remembered what it stood for) or have my juice drank by the rest of the group!
My life is the best book you’ll ever read, and the greatest movie you’ll ever see. When I die, I just ask that you cast Justin Timberlake as the lead and let my wife play herself. That way, she’ll actually enjoy the sex scenes from our past life together! Consider that my dying gift to you, sweetheart! You. Are. Welcome.
Ok, I know by now, you’ve all forgotten where we were, but does it really matter? Danielle, Dan, Britney, and Shane all discuss who the biggest threats in the house are. Everyone mentions Boogie, Frank, and then Janelle. Britney throws Wil in the mix, but that’s just because she’s an idiot PSR. She doesn’t know any better. Girls always flock to the gay guys and think they’re so great, so we have to imagine that her and Janelle both think Wil is a big threat when everyone else knows they’re more a liability than anything else. And, not just because they’re gay. Just because this gay guy happens to suck at the game! Typically, the gay guy would be friends with all the girls in the house and be dangerous because of their social game, but Wil doesn’t really seem to have a friend in the house, to tell the truth. So, I’m not so sure why they think he’s so dangerous.
Dan reveals that he doesn’t want one of the former coaches to be nominated. He offers up the idea to nominate Wil and Frank, with Wil as the pawn. He figures that if the former coaches are all still around, he’ll have less of a target on his back. Of course, I’m assuming he also forgot that he, himself, is a former coach, but we are talking about Dan here, so who knows what this moron is thinking. I’m assuming he just thought that he’d be less of a threat to his own alliance, but again that makes no sense, so whatever. Just go home already. I swear on everything holy that if he wins this game, I’m burning my house down. And then suing CBS, Big Brother, Dan, and the entire f*cking city of Dearborn for wasting 8 weeks of my damn life when I could have been out making something of myself. If I get a judge who watches Big Brother, I’m walking away a millionaire!!
Quickly, Wil reminds Danielle that she told him she’d keep him safe if he jumped down. And here we are, back to my original thought about people who are going to fall off anyway brokering deals when they have no life left in the competition? Why would Danielle care about keeping Wil safe if he jumped off? It was so early on in the competition when Wil jumped off that making that deal was idiotic. Where was a trademark Dan pep talk when that one happened?
In between “serious” moments, CBS threw in a “fun” one with Ian trying to mack on Ashley with his personality and brain while she creams herself watching Shane work out with no shirt on. I think we all saw Ashley pop a boner with that stare down. Let’s not let her do the commentary for Olympics weightlifting competition.
We head on over to the nomination ceremony, where Boogie says, for the third time tonight, that he will be offended if he’s not nominated. I mean, come on, don’t these people know who he is?!? Anyway, Danielle proves that she has no mind of her own and that she’s not playing her own game, and just listening to Dan, when she nominates Wil and Frank for eviction. At the very end of the show, we see her crying in the HOH room with Wil, which I’m sure she followed up with how sorry she was and how he’s the pawn and blah, blah, blah. I still believe her best play was to nominate Frank and Boogie, guaranteeing that one of them goes home. Now, she has to worry about Boogie winning veto and both of them being safe. I know that is highly unlikely of a scenario, but she may be forgetting that she’s on a show where the fix is always in and Boogie is about the only person in the house people are tuning in to watch, so I doubt they’re letting him go home this week. They’re either going to make it so Boogie wins or make it so either Frank or Wil don’t. No matter what, Frank SHOULD go home this week. They’ve been trying to get him out for a few weeks now, so I’m guessing it finally happens.
I’m NOT going to check the spoilers and see who won Veto even though I want nothing more than to do it! So, please don’t spoil it for me this week! After this week is over, you can start spoiling it for me, again, but I just want to test it out and see if it is more fun to watch the show without knowing. I’ll have that answer for you in Friday’s blog.
Until then,
Written by:
Scott Ottersen
Email: ScottOttersen@yahoo.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/ScottOttersen
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/ChokeOnMyBlog
I always wondered the same thing about “pharmaceutical sales reps”; there were always like, three or four of them per Survivor and Bachelor/ette season along with “students,” and “actors/actresses/models.” The reason is because these people (for the most part) don’t have 9 to 5er’s and can take three months off without quitting their jobs. It’s a nice perk, but I’m a teacher and currently reaping the benefits of my own 10-month job, so I’m not complaining:)
Great recap again, Scott.
Yup, the network had this suprise worked out from the get go – I dont believe for a nano second that America voted these guys to go back in. As you way, whatever – it is what it is and thats why my instinct about Miss Vapid Spraytanner 2012 being in the running for the prize isnt so far fetched. Shes completely up Janelles a$$, and I can see her being taken to the end as who would expect jury members (other than Ian) to vote giving her a tic tac, let alone the money.
Dan as a coach makes me howl. But the fact is, he knows this chick will do as he says – to get HIM as far as he can. Theres no coaching involved here – its simply manipulating the weak and vulnerable. Can you imagine how much fun Colton from survivor would have with this chick!! Hed be calling her all sorts of names, pointing out how she has no chance of winning, and STILL get her to do what he wanted!
…And when this is over, I hope they recruit Ian for Bachelor Pad 4.
At this point, I’m willing to say anybody can win this game. It definitely depends on who the final 2 is, but I think Ashley is actually the LEAST likely to win it all. Unless she comes on strong in the end, there isn’t a soul in that house that is going to vote for her. The only way she’d win is if Willie came back into the game and was final 2 with her. But, like “they” always say, you just never know what is going to happen. Stranger things in life have definitely happened than Ashley possibly winning Big Brother!!
Ian would have a heart attack from having an extended hard-on if he went on Bachelor Pad…
I don’t understand why Boogie is so shocked about them being screwed over and the plan for Frank to be back doored. Especially if he thinks of himself as the biggest target in the game, why would he assume anything any of them tell him wouldn’t be some sort of strategy? He seems to think everyone is really dumb (well, a lot of them are) – dumber than him – and he’s just thinking ‘no one would screw me over’. I mean, from the very first time he got screwed with them putting up Frank, he should have been on high alert for it to happen again. Unless some big incident happens or you have a very different kind of cast, an initial target will always be a target until they are gone. It’s like people in BB have tunnel vision that way (whether they should evict that person or not). I feel like Boogie feels like he’s so above these people, that he shouldn’t have to even play the game with them, b/c they are not worthy – but this cockiness is going to cost him – he already had 3 instances of it already coming close to doIng so – but of course, if CBS keeps stepping in to save him and his team, I guess he’ll have a few more.
I hope the newbies soon break their old patterns and forget about their past groupings because they still are playing as though they still have coaches. Exactly Scott – Danielle is an idiot for doing what Dan said, for falling for Shane, and for thinking she’s better than Janelle. As for Dan, ya the first move was dumb, but I thought his second move of not getting any of the coaches nominated was a good one. And he seemed to do it without much of an argument. Those newbies need Willie to come back in and give them another pep talk – or just replay his previous one over and over again for a while on the big screen. Some of these floaters need to step up and start playing.
Also last week, a couple of people said about the winner of HOH (I don’t read spoilers) would be a game changer – why did you think that? Given Danielle will always look out for Shane – and I guess Dan?
I think Danielle winning IS a game-changer. Anytime someone who isn’t expected to win pulls out a victory, the house goes into scared-puppy mode. Everyone is looking around because nobody knows what that person is going to do. Yes, everyone knew she wouldn’t put up Shane or Dan, but who else was safe? Nobody. And, she proved that by even going back on her word and putting up Wil. She is a loose cannon because nobody in the house even talked to her about strategy, and she didn’t talk to anyone, either. She barely even campaigned for herself to stay when she was on the block, so nobody really knew where she would stand. Plus, it’s inherent that when a “weak” player wins HOH they ALWAYS vote out a “strong” player because they understand they probably won’t ever win HOH again, so they need to take full advantage of the week. Hence why she wants Frank out and Boogie second. That is why I considered it a game changer. She will easily move up the totem pole, as well, and become able to form new alliances that she once wasn’t able to crack because she was expendable to everyone else. But, since she proved she CAN win an HOH, people are going to go to her and bargain with her and make deals, etc. If Frank, Shane, or even Boogie won HOH, all the deals in the house pretty much stay the same. Now, with a newbie HOH, all bets are off and anyone can be anyone’s ally…
Okay, I think I’d agree with that if it was Ian, Ashley, or Jenn that won the HOH – that would be the case for them, it would have been a very unpredictable week. Danielle might have had potential to be a game changer, but since she is now seen as synonymous with Shane, and is smitten with him, that weakens what power she could have had on her own to up her game. After her HOH reign is over, people will go to Shane or both of them to secure Danielle’s vote – I don’t see her making alliances on her own without Shane or Dans okay at this point. She has proved her inability to strategize on her own up to this point, she has not proven she has potential to be a game player. I think you’re giving her too much credit! 🙂
Does anyone else feel like the producers of BB screw up everything? LOL, seriously….this wasn’t from Sunday, but still pissed that there was no eviction Thursday. Producers just did it on purpose to spice up the house, and that’s stupid to me. I swear, any time I like where the game is headed, the people who are still there, a twist happens to “spice it up,” and it always goes against any person I like. I get twists in the game, but no eviction was crap. I want Frank gone. I promise I won’t tell you a word of what’s going on Scott, I hope you know that’s hard for me and my big mouth!!
Thanks Jackie, I appreciate you not telling me anything you’ve read/seen! I have come to the determination that the episodes of Big Brother may become better without reading the spoilers, but the days in between the episodes have become WAY too boring, without reading about the spoilers. So, I think this is definitely the last week I’ll be going the no spoilers route…
What am I missing? Why was Wil the only person she (and her boss) thought of when it came to needing a pawn?
I might be just guessing here – but Rainy, I think its because she (they) think of Wil as the next big target to get out of the house. So, in the off chance that Boogie wins the POV and takes Frank of the block (so they are both safe) she would have what she/they think as the next biggest target on the block. So he’s a pawn, as long as Frank or Boogie sits beside him. If not, then he’d be the next to go. They’ve talked about him before being the next biggest threat – Janelle used her save on him last week because he was going to go up last week on the block (why they think of him as a threat I do not understand).
I think…
I’d find it seriously difficult to continue watching this show without spoilers or without watching After Dark. There is just SO much more going on than what is broadcast.
All I will say for now (having read spoilers and having watched two After Dark programmes over the past week) is this: Boogie is freaking brilliant. 🙂
Cnd – thank you! I was being too short sighted and literal. They said pawn and I went with it. Love the insight lol. I do agree that I wonder also why they seem to view Wil as a huge threat.
Alright, I’m woman enough to totally admit it, I was wrong about Danielle, I did not think she had it in her to do what she did this week – even if it is all Boogie – and they know that too, so that’s not a secret. Although the power seems to be going to her head. I did not call that one!
Scott where are you? I’m waiting or your riday blog. Anyone know what happened to Scott?