Shane gives up the HOH to Ian after striking a deal with him that him and Danielle would both be safe from being nominated, and also safe from being backdoored. I don’t even think Shane needed to discuss this in private with Ian, because it was already a foregone conclusion. But, Shane just wanted to make sure, I guess, about Danielle maybe, I don’t know. Ian agreed to keep them safe, although if I’m Ian, and I nominate Frank and Jenn (which we all know he is going to do), and Frank wins the Veto, Shane is my number one replacement nominee. Seriously, if Frank wins the Veto, takes himself off of the block, and Ian nominates Joe, I will fly to Los Angeles, find this house that these morons are staying in, break down that crappy front door, and strangle the idiot myself, while reciting the Periodic Table of Elements. Punch to the face, Helium 2, kick to the gut, Potassium number 19, balls shot, Ununpentium number 119, yeah you didn’t think you were the only one who knew the elements, did you dork? Way to get Joe or Jenn out of the game with your HOH! Great move.
And, then we get the scene where I was proven correct on why Frank should have just gotten Dan out last week, no matter what the @sshole said to you! He tells all of America that he is rejoining the Quack Pack Band of Losers because he likes them better. No, Dan, incorrect, you are rejoining them because one of them won HOH and they will keep you safe if you rejoin. See, doesn’t anyone else see how this just makes him a damn floater? Isn’t that the definition of a floater: someone who never wins anything and just follows the power from week to week, doing and saying whatever they have to in order to keep themselves safe. Again, I understand Dan may be better at doing and saying those things better than others, but he’s still a damn floater in my book, and I hate the fact that a floater ever won this game. Just how we all hate how floaters have won Survivor, as well. It just seems to be CBS shows where this happens, am I right? Does anybody else not believe in coincidences?
Joe proves just how dense he truly is by telling Frank that there is a chance he may not be nominated. Really, Juggles? Have you been playing the same game the rest of the house has this entire season? He is just truly out of the loop entirely. I don’t even think he knows everybody’s names. The rest of the players are probably playing games with him to see how confused they can get him. Jenn probably told him she was straight, and a man. Ashley told him she graduated Summa Cum Laude from Princeton (double entendre there). Dan told him he liked his cooking. It’s become the season of F*ck with Juggles. Too easy. Sure, Joe, Ian is going to put up Dan and Jenn. Keep telling yourself that and looking surprised when that doesn’t happen. I am actually going to start rooting for Joe to make it to the end, just so that this game can be discredited.
For all of those that don’t follow the live feeds and/or read blogs that talk about them, we have all been subjected to Ian talking about how badly he wants to win HOH because he wants to “rub one out.” He has spoken those words numerous times throughout the season, and even did it during the HOH competition. For all of those that don’t know what that means, it means the little bastard wants to take his penis out, wrap his fingers around it, close them into a fist to forcefully lock onto his penis skin, rub it back and forth until a white/clear liquid comes out of the tip. Yes, he wants to jerk off in the HOH room. This is his fantasy about the Big Brother game. It was never about getting a full experience of the show, eating slop, playing in Veto competitions, and the like, it was all about winning an HOH competition, and then jerking off each night that week while everyone else in the house knew exactly what he was doing. Congratulations on that, sir. You should be ever so proud.
And, I won’t even comment on the dancing in the bed, shirtless. I’m guessing he JUST got done rubbing two out at that moment. But, right after that, he tells the Duck Squad that he is going to nominate Frank and Jenn. Duh.
Another scene of the Douchest Douche of them all telling us how he won that crown. It was just last week when he was in the midst of swearing on his wife, to Frank, that he would be by his side the rest of this game, if he kept him last week. Now, he’s telling us, and his wife, that those words MEANT NOTHING TO HIM!!! Just so you know, sweetheart, you mean nothing to me, and when I tell people I “swear on my wife” and “my wedding ring,” I’m going to break that bond just two days later. Seriously, I know it’s a game, and you say things just to say them and to get yourself into a better position, but I don’t know many women who would be proud to call that man their husband. But, I’m sure the Dan-lovers will be emailing me telling me about how that’s just another example of how great of a player he is, etc, yeah but it still makes him an @sshole, and the fact that you are standing so firmly beind an @sshole who would sell out his own marriage to win some stupid game says something about you! No, just kidding, I love you because you are reading my blog, but seriously stop liking Dan so much! 🙂 The guy is just a loser. Plain and simple. That is akin to a father, in the stands at his kids baseball game, watching his kid strike out to lose a game, hearing other parents talking about how his kid is a loser, lost the game, so on and so forth, and then joining in to make fun of how his kid lost the game, all while the kid was standing right there listening and seeing his father do, and say those things! If you think that is the father you want for your kids, keep liking Dan. For me, he’s not my type of person. Just saying. You put your word on your marriage, you then break that word, you call your wife and tell her you want a divorce!! In life, your word is all you have. I know it’s different in a game like this, but not when you say things like that. Ok, rant over, we all know my feelings on Dan! Maybe that’s the vodka and sprite talking!!
Well, luck is when preparation meets opportunity….he may be an @sshole, but it’s not too different than Boogies run. I know you’ll think I’m just arguing with you, but production intervened a number of times with Frank and Boogie and not much of a stink was kicked up about that…Boogie didn’t win any competitions either (except for money and no one was against him in that!). Also, Boogie getting Janelle out and the conversations that preceeded were a very lucky hapinstance, or production interfered (you know, cause production must be present with all major strategy 🙂 ) The only real difference is Boogie choose to stay loyal to one or two (but still gave props to Ian when he found out what he did) and he’s a lot funnier so it cushions the blow a bit, but I imagine many think to Boogie as a cocky @sshole too. Oh yeah, and now Boogie is gone, so there is that.
Don’t get me wrong, I loved Boogie, (and Dr. Will) and I’m kind of not sure of Dan, he has showed some real fundamental bad person behaviour a few times, just really cold, and i agree that if you swear on those kinds of things its pretty horrible to the next day with barely a blink to go back on your word, but I honestly think Boogie and Dan’s games are not night and day. More like night and later that night.
Ultimately though, I can’t believe Ian is blaming Frank – he is NOT kaiser soze. As soon as Dan started his funeral, I said “no f’in way, what a bunch of manipulative b.s.” and did not buy any of it (and that way confirmed with Dans diary room) and COULD NOT BELIEVE NOT ONE PERSON seriously doubted it. Shane mentioned the right thing, but obviously didn’t really believe it as he cried and did nothing to stop it. I mean if they believed all that, and this week Dan is back in the quak pack, he honestly deserves to win.
Your last “Dan is an @sshole” that you couldn’t remember why is probably when he talked about how he screwed the quack pack over last week, got Brit voted out, Ian’s best pal, and now he’s part of the quack pack again and how his rise from the dead was now complete. I’d say that sentiment makes sense to think here.
Ian is blaming Frank and not Dan for hurting his game (removing Brittney) becaus he is blidnded by his super-fan desire of wanting to be known for something in BB History. Specifically he wants to be known as the mastermind and founder of the QP. Seriously, on the live feeds he has made comments to himself and to others acting as if he was the one who came up with the group and pulled them together to work as one.
In reality we know that isn’t the case. It was Britney/Shane and Dan/Danielle realizing they needed to work together since Boogie/Janelle hadn’t lost anybody and Ian happend to walk in their lap as they were hammering out a final 4. It was Dan and Britney’s idea and Ian only supplied the name which he must have had prepared ebfore coming on the show since I’ve never seen someone jump so fast to name a group or even to want to name a group in BB.
He foolishly believes the QP is his legacy and he so desperately wants it to succeed that he is completely overlooking Dan’s hand in the last eviction.
Well Scott, slightly hammered or not, ya nailed it.
I wish putting back some vodka before I watch the show would help the entertainment value, but I know that watching or listening to Joe for more than 5 seconds would bring out the heaves.
How sad is it that the only thing that makes this show more interesting for those paying for the live feeds is 2 guys (that leave a lot to be desired physically) constantly gratifying themselves–uh oh–here come the heaves…
Couldnt agree more about Dan being a floater. Hasnt won squat, his entire social game consists of being seen reading the bible and the best luck in the world to get stuck in a house with the vapid and clueless. Can you imagine if Dan tried to get himself off the block trying to sell that story to Boogie instead of Frank. Boogie would have been in the DR seconds after Dan left him, make a pretend call to Dr Wil about the convo he just had with this dumba$$, and proceed to laugh himself into a seizure.
I do miss Brit and her DR sessions. She had some great lines and zingers that broke up the monotony. Maybe I will start pounding back the vodka before shows–and just keep the garbage can handy
Dozenz that makes perfect sense. I now totally get why Ian still wants to hang on to QP. Dumb, but I get it.
Dan’s a first-rate a$$hole, but that’s okay because he knows it and has used it to an enormous advantage. I can handle that.
Ian’s pathetic (and he doesn’t know it), and I’m now agreeing with Scott that Ian falls somewhere along the autistic spectrum. It’s the rocking. And rocking. And rocking. And rocking. I can handle that, too.
Joe isn’t in the game to win; he’s in the game to get a show on the Food Network. Good luck with that, Joe. Especially when everyone knows you don’t wash your hands after using the bathroom, or after picking zits on your back, or after picking at your face, or after stroking that weird thing hanging under your bottom lip – UG! But I can handle that.
Jenn thinks she’s a player (too little, too late) and talks about how “mature” she is. Too bad she acts like a 20-yr-old rocker “wannabe” rather than the 37-yr-old “never-was” she really is. But I can handle that.
Shane started off physically strong but has lost his edge. Also, he’s clueless. And his hot-and-cold “showmance” with Danielle is simply embarrassing. But I can handle that.
Frank was a shoe-in to win until he decided to trust Dan. Frank, Frank, Frank. Boogie is crying copious tears of anger and frustration into his beer! But, yes, I can even handle that.
The one person I can NOT handle is Danielle! STFU you stupid little twit! Stop slobbering all over Shane – you look and sound like a 10-yr-old swooning over Justin Bieber! Get your freaking lies straight: Are you a nurse? A charge nurse? An Emergency Room nurse? A physician’s assistant? A med-school student (highly unlikely)? Or are you just a whiny little airhead who still thinks her “worth” is somehow all wrapped up in her former-beauty-queen persona? That’s why I HATE “Toddlers & Tiaras” – Danielle said that her parents and (much older) siblings put her in beauty pageants when she was just a baby.
To Danielle’s family: What were you thinking?! You’ve created a perpetually immature, extremely needy crybaby who can’t stop talking about how she looks, constantly harping about what other people (whether houseguests or audience members) are thinking about her butt, her body, her skin, her weight …. Aughhhhhhh! (<— See Lucy, from Peanuts). I can't take it anymore!
Phew! That feels better.
And all I had was a single glass of wine!
Still loving your recaps, Scott! Now, drink lots and lots of water, take a couple of aspirin, and go to bed.
I don’t want to argue with you but wasn’t Boogie a floater on your terms. Never winning anything? I don’t think you have to win comps to be a strong player. Boogie didn’t, and Dan chooses not to. Well that’s what he says, who knows if he would actually win or not. I don’t really like Dan all that much but how he saved himself was brilliant. You might not see it that way, but he is still in the house and other “strong” players aren’t. I think what pulls Dan apart is he tells he strategy in the DR and others have no clue, Jenn is the ultimate floater. At least Joe had to fight for his life earlier in the game because he was such a huge target! Love your recaps, keep up the good work!
Have you seen the video of Danielle acting completely bat sh*t crazy staring at herself in the mirror making faces?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0nSQuEzzr0