Big Brother Recap – 7/6/15

Here we all are again, trained lab rats just sitting in front of our televisions watching a bunch of lab rats scurrying around a house! And we wouldn’t have it any other way on this wonderful Sunday (well, Monday or whatever day you’re reading this) night!

Quick note about tonight, I’m all class over here at my two-person viewing party, eating jello shots with a spoon. The one thing you should take away from reading this blog is that I’m in no way a wreck of a human being. I’m completely stable.

Also, I may have a special treat for you later today or tomorrow or at some point this week, depending on when I release whatever it is I have up my sleeve for you all. It’ll be worth the wait, so since you have no choice but to wait, just hold on to your reality show horses and know that it’ll be awesome. Or not, who knows.

Let’s get to the reason you’re all here…

The show starts off with Shelli telling us she can’t believe she won HoH. Don’t worry, Shelli, we can’t believe it, either! And the second obvious fact of the night is that Clay is excited that she won HoH. Well of course you are, Clay. Your Big Brother sugar mama will be nuzzling you close all week to keep you all warm and safe. And, to complete the trifecta, we get the resident shot of the one Shelli/Clay can’t stand anymore, Da’Vonne, letting us know she’s not happy that the person who hates her the most in the house is now in power. It’s fixing to be a great week for Shelli and Clay, and a down week for Da’Vonne.

After last week’s exposure of Audrey as the crazy person in the house, we have to delve deeper into that storyline, so tonight we’re told about how Audrey told some folks how Vanessa (who has been non-existent so far) was the mastermind of an all-girls alliance she was trying to form. There wasn’t much clarity given to whether or not the alliance was formed or if Vanessa was just discussing it, but that doesn’t much matter when what matters most is that crazy is involved and we just want to see the crazy. And crazy is what we get when Audrey then goes to Vanessa to tell her that there are people in the house that are associating her with an all girls alliance. I’m not exactly sure why she felt the need to tell her that, but she did, and then made matters worse when Da’Vonne entered the room to talk to Vanessa, and as she left Vanessa asked her who thinks she’s a mastermind of a girls alliance and Audrey spits out that’s one of them right there, speaking in regards to Da’Vonne. First off, the whole going to Vanessa to “warn her” was beyond stupid, but then choosing someone who so obviously is friendly with her to be a part of the scheme made it even more beyond what stupid can ever be. Like, I’ll never be smart enough to come up with a stupid enough word to explain the move she just made.

And not only did I think it was stupid, the karma gods felt it was stupid, too, because Vanessa immediately (or at least in episode time it was immediate) confronted Audrey about her story. She asked Audrey right in front of Da’Vonne but in true fashion of what crazy means, Audrey never breaks and tells Vanessa that Da’Vonne did say that she heard about the alliance from her. Da’Vonne, literally dumbstruck by the craziness that is Audrey decides she needs to call a house meeting to call out this crazy demon and have the house exercise this poltergeist b!tch. But, just like that little girl on the bed telling the priest at her exorcism that his mom sucks c*ck in Hell, Audrey never broke character and if she was going down, she was going down with the lie. She continues to deny she made up the story about the all girls alliance and that Vanessa was never masterminding one. Kudos to the b!tch for having the balls for that. Sorry…let me correct myself here, kudos to the b!tch for once having balls. My mistake there. If I’m being honest, I actually think that was the right move for her do. At this point, she’s beyond nuts, but at least she’s nuts and not admitting to lies. In the game of Big Brother, people lie about everything. For all the rest of the house knows, she is telling the truth and Vanessa was trying to form an all girls alliance. If she never admits it, it surely could be true. Who knows. But still…everyone in that house knows Audrey is all types of crazy. There’s no denying that. She can deny it all you want, but the last person to know you’re crazy is you, honey, so fight the power for a little while longer but go ahead and seek Big Brother help as soon as you can.

After all that goes down, the show tries to restore some sanity and give us some game talk between Shelli and Becky about what they’d like to see happen this week. They both formally agree to nominate pawns so they can backdoor Audrey on Thursday. And while they’re in power, they want to use it to gain all the information they can from the house. Smart………..

………until Becky decides she needs to tell EVERYONE in the house what the plan for the week is. I’m sure she probably used Kathy Griffin’s phone to call some people outside the house to let them know, too. She just started dialing random numbers, letting them know they’re safe and Audrey’s getting backdoored. I mean, seriously Becky, you couldn’t just tell these people they’re safe and then ask them where their head is at? You just got done saying you want to GAIN information, not GIVE away information. Nobody has to tell you sh!t because the sixth word out your mouth is “Audrey.” Followed by, “She’s going home this week.” Then followed up with, “Don’t tell anyone about the plan.” Really, Becky?!? Nobody has to tell anyone because YOU TOLD THE WHOLE DAMN HOUSE ANYWAY!!!!!