Big Brother Recap – 7/31/15

We start off the episode with, surprise surprise, Shelli choking up and almost in tears. And not only do we get that, but we get Vanessa speaking in tongues. This should be a doozy…

After the disaster that was the attempted throwing of the Battle of the Block, James takes it upon himself to apologize for not doing enough to lose. He probably doesn’t need to do it, but it’s a smart play. He probably could have done more to make sure they lost, but since he didn’t, apologizing is the next best step.

If that wasn’t enough, Liz is figuring it out that James was throwing the competition since he wasn’t doing much or putting much effort into the things that he was doing. She’s telling Austin about her thoughts on James throwing it, which has him thinking that something is going on in the house that he’s not aware of, and has him trying to figure out who the backdoor options would be, since he was thinking it was going to be Steve. So, he approaches Vanessa about the idea of Jason throwing the competition as if she wouldn’t have anything to do with it. C’mon bro, you have to think that if someone in the battle of the block is throwing the competition, that the HoH that NOMINATED HIM would have been in on it! This entire season, with Vanessa and Shelli in power, someone has always been throwing the Battle of the Block, so you have to go ahead and assume that would remain the same this time around and Vanessa was not only in the know, but the one who orchestrated it all. This guy is really not thinking straight. I’d blame it on the penis brain again, but I think his penis brain is asleep when he talks to Vanessa.

Speaking of penis brain, we get the #BBnomance between Austin and Liz. Austin steals a kiss on the lips from Liz and mistakenly believes that she’s as into it as he is. He’s delusional and clueless to think that way. If you’re trying to mack on a girl and she pretends to see cars on the wall, there’s only two options at this point. One, she’s trying to get you off of her. Or two, she’s on acid…and still wants you to get off of her, seeing as how she probably assumes you’re a car and are going to run her over…

The Veto players get picked and Vanessa has a mini panic attack that Liz gets chosen because if she wins, she could possibly keep the nominations the same. Two things here, Vanessa – first, Liz ain’t winning sh!t. Second, guess what, YOU’RE THE HOH AND IN AN ALLIANCE WITH HER, if you want her to change the nominations, she’ll do it. Of course, she’ll hate it after she does it and you put up her main ally, but that’s just life in the Big Brother house. So, with the chance of her winning, she starts thinking it’s a good idea to tell her about the plan to backdoor Austin. Shelli is actually the sane one here, telling Vanessa that it’s not the smartest idea to do it right away and to wait until after the Veto competition, see who wins, what the options are then, and then talk to her about it. I think we’re all just happy that Shelli didn’t cry as she told her this.

At the Veto competition, it would seem that it was “tail”or made for Austin (see what I did there), and in the end he pulls out the easy win as nobody was truly even that close to him. The kid even stopped for a good few moments and still the closest person to him was probably 100 away after he finished…and won!

One quick note from the Veto competition is aimed towards Meg – um, I’ve been to New York City, and you fools most definitely “do squirrels.” I think I made good friends out of 10-15 squirrels while I was there, feeding them some food and also naming a few of them. My wife and I made a scrapbook of our trip and we even included a picture of “Marcus the squirrel” on one of the pages since I’d never seen a black squirrel before and thought it was the coolest thing. I just thought I’d get that off my chest here…

And what was up with Steve being rude to Becky in the DR? I didn’t see that one coming from him and wonder if there’s some sort of bad feelings between the two of them? Anyone know of any issues between the two of them?

After Clay wins the Veto, Vanessa decides to talk to Liz about the plan to backdoor Austin because of the conversation that he had with Jason. Liz tells Vanessa that she already knew about the conversation that he had with Jason, which sort of should have thrown a wrench in the entire trust issue they had with Austin and definitely threw a wrinkle in her plan to have Liz on their side to backdoor him this week. Vanessa tries to backtrack a bit and let her know that she’s becoming a bigger target in the house, not only because of the twin twist but also because of her “nomance.” Funny that she brings that up, and that’s for two reasons. First, what about Clay and Shelli? Are you telling Shelli to back up off of Clay because they’re making each other bigger targets? Nope. And second, isn’t the whole point of them being in your alliance to make the target on her back a whole heck of a lot smaller since she has the numbers on her side? Besides, even as much as Liz loves her sister, SHE still wants to win the game and having Austin on her side is definitely helping her do that.

And because of her obviously wanting him to stay in the game and telling Vanessa that she doubts he’d do anything to go against their alliance, Vanessa starts having doubts about backdooring him and wants to talk to him. So she sends up Austin, and then him and Vanessa have a conversation that ends with Vanessa telling Austin that he’s possibly a target to go home this week because of what he did. He tells her all about penis brain and how he wishes he could cool him down and keep his mouth shut, but unfortunately he’s fallen in love in the Big Brother house and that just got the best of him. Vanessa even showed her inner Shelli to Austin by crying a bit to get across just how hurt she was that he did that and betrayed her so greatly. I think Vanessa is going a bit overboard here, but I know it’s a game and all and Austin did pull a dumb game move. So, since Vanessa can’t make a decision on her own, she tells him that if he can go work it out with the terribly named Clelli, he can stay. I feel as if she should have ended the conversation with a “Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.”